viva sweet spring

Y'all know how much I cherish e.e. cummings.  He's a sweet one for spring. This poem is over referenced, but only due to its accuracy.

"sweet spring is your
time is my time is our
time for springtime is lovetime
and viva sweet love"

(all the merry little birds are
flying in the floating in the
very spirits singing in
are winging in the blossoming)

lovers go and lovers come
awandering awondering
but any two are perfectly
alone there's nobody else alive

(such a sky and such a sun
i never knew and neither did you
and everybody never breathed
quite so many kinds of yes)

not a tree can count his leaves
each herself by opening
but shining who by thousands mean
only one amazing thing

(secretly adoring shyly
tiny winging darting floating
merry in the blossoming
always joyful selves are singing)

"sweet spring is your
time is my time is our
time for springtime is lovetime
and viva sweet love"

some writing tips from Mr. Kerouac ...

http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2012/03/22/jack-kerouac-belief-and-technique-for-modern-prose/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+brainpickings/rss+(Brain+Pickings)

Scribbled secret notebooks, and wild typewritten pages, for yr own joy

Cactus Tree - Joni Mitchell

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There's a man who's been out sailing
In a decade full of dreams
And he takes her to a schooner
And he treats her like a queen
Bearing beads from California
With their amber stones and green
He has called her from the harbor
He has kissed her with his freedom
He has heard her off to starboard
In the breaking and the breathing
Of the water weeds
While she was busy being free

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There's a man who's climbed a mountain
And he's calling out her name
And he hopes her heart can hear
Three thousand miles he calls again
He can think her there beside him
He can miss her just the same
He has missed her in the forest
While he showed her all the flowers
And the branches sang the chorus
As he climbed the scaley towers
Of a forest tree
While she was somewhere being free

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There's a man who's sent a letter
And he's waiting for reply
He has asked her of her travels
Since the day they said goodbye
He writes "Wish you were beside me
We can make it if we try"

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He has seen her at the office
With her name on all his papers
Thru the sharing of the profits
He will find it hard to shake her
From his memory
And she's so busy being free

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There's a lady in the city
And she thinks she loves them all
There's the one who's thinking of her
There's the one who sometimes calls
There's the one who writes her letters
With his facts and figures scrawl
She has brought them to her senses
They have laughed inside her laughter
Now she rallies her defenses
For she fears that one will ask her
For eternity
And she's so busy being free

There's a man who sends her medals
He is bleeding from the war
There's a jouster and a jester
And a man who owns a store
There's a drummer and a dreamer
And you know there may be more
She will love them when she sees them
They will lose her if they follow
And she only means to please them
And her heart is full and hollow
Like a cactus tree *
While she's so busy being free

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© 1968; Siquomb Publishing Company

Some words for the soul ...

Don't Know (by Lisa Hannigan)

I don't know what you smoke
Or countries you been to
If you speak any other languages
Other than your own, I'd like to meet you

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I don't know if you drive

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If you love the ground beneath you
I don't know if you write letters or you panic on the phone
I'd like to call you all the same,
If you want to
I am game

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I don't know if you can swim
If the sea is any draw for you

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If your better in the morning or when the sun goes down

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I'd like to call you

I don't know if you can dance
If the thought ever occurred to you
If you eat what you've been given or you push it around your plate
I'd like to cook for you all the same
I would want to
I am game

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If you walk my way, I could keep my head
We could creep away
In the dark
Or maybe now
We could shoot it down anyway

I don't know if you read novels or the magazines
If you love the hand that feeds you
I assume that your heart's been bruised
I'd like to know you

You don't know if I can draw at all
Or what records I am into

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If I sleep like a spoon or rarely at all

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Or maybe you would do
Or maybe you would do

If you walk my way, I will keep my head
We will feel our way through the dark

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Though I don't know you
I think that I would do
I don't fall easy at all
At all at all at all at all

If you walk my way, I will keep my head
We will feel our way through the dark
Though I don't know you
I think that I would do
I don't fall easy at all

I lost my job, I miss my mom, I wish my cat could talk ...

My highs are high, my lows are low

And I don't know which way to go

Every time you leave this house,

Everything falls apart

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I can't get myself off the couch

I don't wanna talk to anyone else

Every time you leave this house,

Everything falls apart

I lost my job, I miss my mom, I wish my cat could talk 

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Every time you leave this house,

Everything falls apart

Well, I don't love you

But I don't hate you

I don't know how I feel

Well, I don't love you

But I don't hate you

I don't know how I feel

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And nothing makes me happy

Not even TV or a bunch of weed

Every time you leave this house,

Everything falls apart

And every time you go away

I feel like I could cry

But I would never really cry because

You're the worst at goodbyes

Goodbyes, at goodbyes

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A few highlights from my Spring Break in London, England

St. Paul's on the Thames, Millennium bridge

Trafalgar Square

High Tea

Hyde park stroll at Dusk

British Museum ceiling

Full English Breakfast

Candy Shop

The London Eye

Camden Lock Market

Every night ...

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Every Night I Just Wanna Go Out, Get Out Of My Head 
Every Day I Don't Want To Get Up, Get Out Of My Bed 
Every Night I Want To Play Out 
And Every Day I Want To Do ooh ooh oh oh 
But Tonight I Just Want To Stay In 
And Be With You, 
And Be With You. 
ooh ............. 
ooh .............. 
Believe Me Mama 

Every Day I Lean On A Lamp Post, I'm Wasting My Time 
Every Day I Lay On A Pillow, I'm Resting My Mind 
Every Morning Brings A New Day 
Every Night That Day Is Through ooh ooh oh oh 

But Tonight I Just Want To Stay In 
And Be With You, 
And Be With You. 
ooh ............. 
ooh .............. 
Believe Me Mama ooh ............. 
ooh ..............

I know why I've waited
Know why I've been blue
I pray each night for someone
Exactly like you

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Why should we spend some money
On a show or two?
No one plays those love scenes
Exactly like you

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You make me feel so grand,
I wanna give the world to you.
You make me understand
Every foolish little dream I'm dreaming
Every scheme I'm scheming.

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I know why my mother
Taught me to be true:
She meant me for someone
Exactly like you

I know why I've waited
Know why I've been blue
I pray each night for someone
Exactly like you

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Why should we spend some money
On a show or two
No one plays those love scenes
Exactly like you



You make me feel so grand
I wanna give the world to you
You make me understand
Every foolish little dream I'm dreaming
Every scheme I'm scheming

I know why my mother
Taught me to be true
She meant me for someone
My baby, exactly like you

Favorite prose that London inspired me to express ... 3/8-3/18/2012

The following are excerpts from my travel diary during my London trip. Some are really funny, rude, emo, and ridiculous but they gave me a good laugh to read them over again.

3/11 -

"Each day that goes by on this vacation I feel I am finding myself a little more. I'm coming back to myself. Cleaning myself off and loving life."

"Kathy, our hostel roommate for two days was fabulous.  She was a petite, energetic Chinese lady from Hong Kong on vacation alone. She had a 12 y/o and an 18 y/o, husband and as she described, "Filipino maid". She said they were all driving her crazy and she needed a month long vacation without them. I love this idea, if you can do it. Every one needs to get away from their duties, identity once in a while to remain sane. I'm insisting on doing a trip for myself every other year. But I like sharing trips.  I don't know if I'll go alone too often. Hopefully my husband and kids would never be that annoying."

"Travel makes you feel richer."

"British guys aren't that hot.  At all, actually.  They are quite homely and small and skinny. I like manly men so obviously I'm not made for a Brit."

"I want a lover.  A strong, creative man.  I want tons of kids running around, giggling and dirty w/ paint or mud on their pants and faces.  No pets though!"

3/12/12

"Waking up to a sunny(!) sky and the sound of St. Paul's nearby. Beautiful."

"Today I saw three mildly attractive British men. I'm coming to the heavy realization that most hot British men live in America or are professional models/actors."

3/17/12

"After awhile 2 older British men (33-44) who'd been standing next to us ALL night FINALLY began to chat us up.  British men only express themselves when the social lubricant of alcohol is involved. {observation}."

"I spoke with Damien. Blue gray eyes. Salt and peppered hair. Flirted shamelessly with him - then he told me about his Australian gf and how he LOVED her. 'I love her.' Ugh, no Damien, I don't want to hear this. At one point we talked about sexting. I suggested he sext his gf and he said 'British men don't do that.'  He went on to tell me how they don't express themselves in public, only in private. He also said if they do express themselves it is a big deal/big occasion that they do so, so it means it is important.
...
BORING!"

"I still want to marry a foreign man. Preferably one that sexts me and chases after me w/ no shame. Spanish most likely. Javier Bardem-like, please. But i also want to be close to my Mom so we can go shopping together and talk and laugh.  So I guess i'll have to do some convincing of the HTSP to exist in an American time zone."

"The French girls in our hostel room have beautiful voices, words. They wear beautiful clothes and sounds so pretty. Tres chic!"

Festa della Donna

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In Italy, "International Women's Day" is called, "Festa della Donna".  This roughly translates as, "Celebration of the Woman".  On this day - at least in Italy - a woman is nobody's Wife, Sister, Mother, or Daughter.  Yellow Mimosa flowers are given to woman on this day and they are encouraged to "take a break" from being their societal role.  Originally, men gave these flowers to women, but now-a-days, women give their girlfriends flowers to.  It's a sign of respect and gratitude for everything that person brings into your life.

I wish we celebrated the day the same way in the U.S. Every woman should feel special and independent of her identity for at LEAST one day of the year, if not every day.

At the gym the other day, I saw a segment on ABC, called, "Woman Under Pressure".  It touched on recent studies that have found that women in America are under an increased amount of stress (DUH!) and due to this stress, are threatening their longevity of life.  Stress produces high amounts of cortisol which rush through the body and heart, setting into motion much unnecessary anxiety. Constant exuding of cortisol not only builds belly fat, but also generates harsh effects to the health of your heart.  More women than men in America die of Heart Disease every year.

The segment highlighted how many women are stressed by deadlines at work, then rush from work to pick up kids, then have to cook, do homework clean.  And by the end of that schedule, no one feels like giving time to their selves - most are too tired.  I don't have children, and many times, I feel i am living an unbalanced lifestyle - too many things to do in one day, but no time for myself.  The story said answers to cutting down on cortisol output were a routine hormone test, regular exercise, eating, sleep.

Women usually act as the glue or center of their households, families.  If we're not healthy, the rest of the community suffers, or as I like to say, "If Mama ain't happy, Ain't nobody happy!"

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As women, we need to remember how important it is that we take time for ourselves.  I think women - especially American women - are made to feel guilty for having their own time.  The Protestant/Puritan Work Ethic has ruined many American lives.  Some people can't stand sitting still, and many find Meditation not only a foreign concept, but are fearful of it.

Life is to be enjoyed, not spent in constant misery.  If you can't sit with yourself, and enjoy what your eating, reading doing or NOT DOING, you'll never be able to find your center, your mojo, your unique and beautiful self. Worse, you're not having a fully human experience. You are doing day to day activities, but are you even conscious or able to feel those moments? It's not easy, but to begin this journey is the best first step you can take for further enlightenment.

Knowing yourself doesn't just happen.  It takes introspection and time and everyone deserve to know who they really are - you are not just a mother, wife, daughter or sister.   

I find Yoga, exercise, eating right and journaling really help me cultivate and get good at learning to enjoy my time, not getting extremely overwhelmed by pointless daily tasks that take away from the magic that is life. It is not always easy, but it is a start.

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