A STREET.

I used to be your favorite drunk
Good for one more laugh
Then we both ran out of luck
And luck was all we had

You put on a uniform
To fight the Civil War
I tried to join but no one liked
The side I’m fighting for

So let’s drink to when it’s over
And let’s drink to when we meet
I’ll be standing on this corner
Where there used to be a street

You left me with the dishes
And a baby in the bath
And you’re tight with the militias
You wear their camouflage

I guess that makes us equal
But I want to march with you
An extra in the sequel
To the old red-white-and-blue

So let’s drink to when it’s over
And let’s drink to when we meet
I’ll be standing on this corner
Where there used to be a street

I cried for you this morning
And I’ll cry for you again
But I’m not in charge of sorrow
So please don’t ask me when

I know the burden’s heavy
As you bear it through the night
Some people say it’s empty
But that doesn’t mean it’s light

So let’s drink to when it’s over
And let’s drink to when we meet
I’ll be standing on this corner
Where there used to be a street

It’s going to be September now
For many years to come
Every heart adjusting
To that strict September drum

I see the Ghost of Culture
With numbers on his wrist
Salute some new conclusion
Which all of us have missed

So let’s drink to when it’s over
And let’s drink to when we meet
I’ll be standing on this corner
Where there used to be a street

Read more http://www.newyorker.com/fiction/poetry/2009/03/02/090302po_poem_cohen#ixzz2AusWSxln

A thousand kisses deep.

1. You came to me this morning
And you handled me like meat.
You´d have to live alone to know
How good that feels, how sweet.
My mirror twin, my next of kin,
I´d know you in my sleep.
And who but you would take me in
A thousand kisses deep?

2. I loved you when you opened
Like a lily to the heat.
I´m just another snowman
Standing in the rain and sleet,
Who loved you with his frozen love
His second-hand physique -
With all he is, and all he was
A thousand kisses deep.

3. All soaked in sex, and pressed against
The limits of the sea:
I saw there were no oceans left
For scavengers like me.
We made it to the forward deck
I blessed our remnant fleet -
And then consented to be wrecked
A thousand kisses deep.

4. I know you had to lie to me,
I know you had to cheat.
But the Means no longer guarantee
The Virtue in Deceit.
That truth is bent, that beauty spent,
That style is obsolete -
Ever since the Holy Spirit went
A thousand kisses deep.

5. (So what about this Inner Light
That´s boundless and unique?
I´m slouching through another night
A thousand kisses deep.)

You don't know how lucky we are.

Well come on let's go,
And head off to Mexico,
And build our dreams on siestas of the day.
I'll take my guitar,
Who knows, it might get us far,
And we'll call each other by our fake names.

We'll restart our lives,
Cut the others off with lies,
You don't know how lucky we are.
But it's you, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico...
And my guitar.

We'll open that tequila bar,
And spend nights under the stars,
And we'll sing songs of salvation.
And when our tricks grow old,
We might be so bold as to think of things,
And broaden our reputation.

We'll restart our lives,
Cut the others off with lies,
You don't know how lucky we are.
But it's you, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico...
And my guitar.

I'll sing the melody line,
Watch you drinking wine,
And we'll say how life is pretty funny.
We'll busk our way there,
'cause we're the perfect pair,
And we'll find there's more life to money.

We'll restart our lives,
Cut the others off with lies,
You don't know how lucky we are.
We'll restart our lives,
Cut the others off with lies,
You don't know how lucky we are.
But it's you, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico,
You, me and Mexico...
And my guitar.

astonishing light

but that I kept my dream

Everett Ruess’ poem “Wilderness Song":

Say that I starved; that I was lost and weary;

That I was burned and blinded by the desert sun;

Footsore, thirsty, sick with strange diseases;

Lonely and wet and cold…but that I kept my dream!

It was the lark

JULIET
  1   Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:
  2   It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
  3   That pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear;
  4   Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate-tree:
  5   Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.
      ROMEO
  6   It was the lark, the herald of the morn,
  7   No nightingale. Look, love, what envious streaks
  8   Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east.
  9   Night's candles are burnt out, and jocund day
 10   Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.
 11   I must be gone and live, or stay and die.

Source: flickr.com via Lesley on Pinterest

a new world.

Nothing  s o   l o v e l y   has  ever  been  c r e a t e d .   He  l o v e s   h e r   as
he  h a s   never  loved  b e f o r e ,   never  could  l o v e   any  o t h e r
being.  H i s   former  ambitions  seem  as  nothing  now;  p a l t r y ,
commonplace, unworthy  of  him.  H e   i s  a  changed  man,  and
t h i s   change  i s  t h e   proof  t h a t   t h a t   o l d   a r t i f i c i a l   l i f e
never was  and  c o u l d  n o t   be  t h e   real  one,  i n  harmony  w i t h
h i s   t r u e   n a t u r e .

Inevitably grows bored

H e   i s  a  t r u e  p i o n e e r ,   f o r e v e r   l e a v i n g   t h e   p a s t   behind,
b e a r i n g   t h e  b r u n t   o f   d a n g e r ,   contemptuous  o f   f e a r   -- a
c o n q u e r o r   who  l e t s  down  anchor  when  t h e  whim  s e i z e s   him,
makes  t h e   s h o r e  h i s   home  f o r  a  while,  then  i n e v i t a b l y   grows
b o r e d   and  moves  on,  to  seek h i s   luck  e l s e w h e r e .

Swift's Attic Owen Wilson

Went out on a date w/ a hot ass man.

We went to Swift's Attic and WHO was seated two tables down?

OWEN WILSON.

Yet again another personal sighting.  First Barton Springs, now Swift's.  I totally have the same taste as Owen Wilson.

This is what we ate. It was amazing.

Scaia wine from Veneto!


Peeler farm’s fried chicken meatball “tsukune“
pickled ginger, nori sauce

Fried Oysters w/ Bacon, Chives and some sort of puree of carrot based something or other.


House tater tot “Swiftine“
smoked ham hock, Dos Lunas queso fresco, Big Daddy gravy


Chocolate 7 ways

More to come ....

Weekend ahead:
Oktoberfest at local brewery
Texas Book Festival
Halloween Parties!!!
Mt. Bonnell

Why I now like Taylor Swift

I've never like Taylor Swift - yes catchy pop song that get stuck in your head - but no - never felt the need to actually purchase or enjoy her songs on purpose.  Just on accident when in the gym or airport, catching myself tapping my foot.

Her recent single "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" is about when she dated Jake Gyllenhaal.  I always though that post-Broke Back, Gyllenhaal turned into a BIG ASSHOLE. He all of a sudden was dating Reese Witherspoon and biking w/ Lance Armstrong and I no longer thought he had any indie cred left. In a similar vein, Jake supposedly felt Taylor had no "indie cred" either:

via http://dlisted.com/2012/10/22/taylor-swift-evil-and-cruel-torturer

Taylor's newest assault on ears "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" is supposedly about Jake Gyllenhaal, and she tells USA Today (via WOW Report) that she wrote that Pee Chee folder poem of a song as an act of revenge against her ex. Taylor's ex hates the kind of music she makes, so she purposefully wrote a bubble gum shit song that would get tons of play and torture him everywhere he went.

"He made me feel like I wasn't as good or as relevant as these hipster bands he listened to. So I made a song that I knew would absolutely drive him crazy when he heard it on the radio. Not only would it hopefully be played a lot, so that he'd have to hear it, but it's the opposite of the kind of music that he was trying to make me feel inferior to."

And when USA Today asked her why would she want to torment someone, she said, "Because that's fun."

I like Taylor Swift SO MUCH MORE NOW. She confirmed my belief that Jake Gyllenhaal had turned into a DOUCHE post-Broke Back.

I also admire the fact that Taylor is willing to share this juicy shit with her fans just in order to give her exes the hardcore middle finger, without resorting to depression or violence.  It may not be the "polite" thing to do, but i agree with her, "it's fun" for all those involved. Most of all the fans, most likely NOT those parties involved. 

The Best Weekend Ever.

I just had the best weekend ever. I ate and drank at a wine bar on a "first date". Hot man, good food. The two best things in life, really. After that I went out dancing w/ my friend to High Ball for 80s nite. SO. MUCH. FUN. During 99 Luftballoons balloons fell from the ceiling.  It was fun to get my groove on. :)

Saturday I held the event, "Home Movie Day".  I've been doing PR on this event and it had a special place in my heart. Like-minded people got together and watched Home film from the 1930s-2006.  amazing memories were shared.  My favorites included a wealthy 1930s toddler swinging in her backyard and then celebrating her older brother's 4th birthday. Another favorite was a film of a 1930s Chinese-American family in San Francisco, eating dumplings (that looked mouth watering) and chilling out in their living room. 

After that, i had an AMAZING sushi meal w/ my friend Jen. and i spent a lot. :) nigiri, yakitori, Japanese pub food, asahi yessssssss. Then i watched Pulp Fiction for the first time and went to watch the UT/Baylor game at my favorite corner bar w/ my roommate.

 

Sunday I swam in Barton Springs and saw Owen Wilson and Woody Harrelson  swimming there as well. Swimming in the spring makes me feel like a mermaid - the seaweed gets tangled around my legs and arms and i sweep it away as i swim. Swimming in October! who knew. After that we went to a macrobiotic cafe and had dinner. It made me feel like Gwenyth Paltrow.

Then me and Stacey went to Lush.  They gave us a color reading, I got "Motivated", "Fantasy" and "Lifted". Stacey got "Ambition" Dynamic" and "Feeling secure".

It was a good weekend.

Austin Celebrity sighting: Woody Harelson and Owen Wilson at Barton Springs

and yes these were taken by me. and yes that is my roommate's shoulder.

FASSY AUSTIN SIGHTING #7

HE WAS AT EAST SIDE KINGS!!!

FASSY sighting #6

GUESS WHO ARE THE NEWEST LONGHORN FANS????????
http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/michael-fassbender

Rooney Mara and Gosling at Soco Food Trailers

From what I can tell they filmed at the SoCo food trailers.

and obviously Rooney had no snack while doing so.


The Daily Mail got their sleaze on and took some good pics.........

Movie set 5 blocks from home.

Last night my friend who sings at the Hyde Park Christian church choir saw Natalie Portman around his rehearsal time.

After my band rehearsal I rode over to check out the scene. The church is a stone's throw away from my home.

I saw tons of trailers and trucks and film equipment filling the parking lot. But no movie stars!

Alas - it was still very cool to see the production parts. Film intrigues me.

FASSBENDER AUSTIN SIGHTING #5

He was just at Fresh Plus - my local grocery store. The Avocados will smell so fresh next time i purchase them.

ERMERRRRRRRRRRGERRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

 

Fassy Sighting #4

Just got this on the Hyde Park listserv.

Anybody know what's filming this morning at Hyde Park Christian Church on 45th between Duval & Eilers Ave?


FASSY IS IN MY 'HOOD.

Fassy Sighting #3

Fassy, Gosling, Rooney and Portman pretending to be musicians at ACL.

it's cute, ain't it?

Even Emma Watson agrees with me.

Emma Watson describes my only experiences dating British men verbatum:

Miss Watson said: ‘English guys are very well put together.

‘They dress really well and they are very well mannered. But they are also very restrained.

‘Usually in the whole courting situation, I‘m used to being first of all, ignored for the first two months of the ritual.

‘And then maybe they'll acknowledge my presence. Then, they'll probably be a little mean to me. And then, maybe we'll, you know...whatever.’

Miss Watson, who is currently on a break from her degree to focus on her acting career, added that things were very different when she came to Brown to study.

She said: ‘Then I arrive in America, and I remember a few nights into Brown [University], this guy just being like, 'I like you. You're great. Let's go on a date. Let's do it.'

‘I'm like, 'I'm sorry, what just happened?' This is like a huge culture shock for me.

‘They're very like open and very straight-forward - but they wear flip-flops and I don't know if I like that.’

Soul mate

Megan:  I'm finding super nice hostels in _____ with 2 bed privates around $20/night

(we're not doing anything fancy with hotels, right...? I'm fine with pretending I'm in college when it comes to lodging haha)

 me:  ya - i need to stay in cheap places so i can eat tons of food

 Megan:  I love the way you think

Source: tumblr.com via Savannah on Pinterest

I wooed whoever I would with my wicked eyes

Part II: The Lament.

When I was a windy boy and a bit
And the black spit of the chapel fold,
(Sighed the old ram rod, dying of women),
I tiptoed shy in the gooseberry wood,
The rude owl cried like a tell-tale tit,
I skipped in a blush as the big girls rolled
Nine-pin down on donkey's common,
And on seesaw sunday nights I wooed
Whoever I would with my wicked eyes,
The whole of the moon I could love and leave
All the green leaved little weddings' wives
In the coal black bush and let them grieve.

Through verdurous glooms and winding mossy

John Keats. 1795–1821 624. Ode to a Nightingale
And haply the Queen-Moon is on her throne    Cluster'd around by all her starry Fays           But here there is no light,   Save what from heaven is with the breezes blown     Through verdurous glooms and winding mossy ways.   40	Source: in-italia.com via Savannah on Pinterest

Fassy makeout

Not only is Fassy in town, he's here and he's making out with the best of them.






 Read more about this here:
https://twitter.com/entylawyer/status/256026557083185154/photo/1

FASSY IS IN AUSTIN, TEXAS

So - after surviving my Gosling encounter w/out fainting, I have learned that MICHAEL "FASSY" FASSBENDER is in town as well, working on the same Terrence Malick film. It's "Untitled" as of now.

So we now have Ryan Gosling, Christian Bale AND Michael Fassbender in one place at one time. AND this place just happens to be where I live. 

This was my initial reaction to the news:

you guys - i might lose it. this is an insane amount of testosterone for one place at one time!!!

As my friend Chad recently put it, "Get this woman some water and a fan. She got tha vapors!"

My friend used to work at Whole Foods.  Her old co-workers SAW FASSY last night in the check out line. All the celebrities in Austin are spotted at Whole Foods. 

I think if i saw FASSY AND GOSLING in one month my mind may be permanently blown by the exuding hotness. What can I say? I'm easily excited by hot men. and they don't have to be famous, but in this blog post they are. As writer, Karen Noble, says "I love how a man’s body looks, sprawled out on top of his crumpled comforter in boxer shorts with the computer on his stomach. His face lost in thought, halo-ed by the glow of the screen and soft too — not like a woman but a different kind of softness, no matter the muscle mass or the thinness. I love a man’s arms and his hands with shorter nails, thicker callouses, lean biceps, broad shoulders. A man’s body is built. It is constructed and strong and exciting and when a man spoons up behind you, you can feel everything he has, everything he could give."

Read more at http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/i-love-men/#3AGgCA6OArGvmLUE.99

i need to write a Jackie Collins style novel. That shit would be juicy. #goodideas

And now - a tribute to FASSY.

Source: google.com via Savannah on Pinterest

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Source: chelebelleslair.tumblr.com via Savannah on Pinterest

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Source: google.com via Savannah on Pinterest

 

I met Ryan Gosling at Love This Giant

Friday night I went to the David Byrne/St. Vincent, "Love This Giant" tour.The day I got tickets they were rapidly selling out. I didn't have time to see if anyone else wanted a ticket so I bought only one.  Also, I think my friends are tasteful people, but no one I knew is as crazy about David Byrne or St. Vincent like me.

I went and sat in Bass Concert Hall, waiting for the concert to start. One couple told me they had loved David Byrne forever, but had no clue who this "St. Vincent was." I assured them she was fabulous!

The other couple sitting next to me were two older gay friends. One of them whipped out his phone and showed me a burly bald man posing in his mirror. Obviously some sort of dating website was what my fellow concert-goer was looking at. He asked me, "What do you think? Is he hot? He's hot right?"
I agreed. He then said he was scared b/c he was very Christian. I laughed and said, "Well as long as he's out right?"
He laughed. Then we started talking about Byrne and St. Vincent. They didn't know who she was either.

The concert was AMAZING. The whole thing was rather theatrical, different colored lighting for each song, coinciding w/ mood, and a bit of fog about the stage. The ensemble consisted of very talented horn players, a drummer and St. Vincent and Byrne.

About six songs in, I noticed a man entering the third row in front of me in the dark.  Because I know that Ryan Gosling is here filming a movie w/ Terence Malick, Natalie Portman and Christian Bale, I'm on constant alert that at any moment they may appear like little new characters in the tableau of Austin.

And since I have seen many a paparazzi picture of Gosling, I KNEW  this was him!  He walked in w/ a woman on his left hand side.

Ok, so after recognizing I was in the same room as the HOTTEST MAN ON EARTH, i went back to being in awe of the concert. They encored w/ "Burning down the house" and "Cruel" - two of my favorites.

There is NOTHING like hearing the music you jam out to live. It has even more resonance with your ears, heart, soul. Every word is pulsing through the speakers and everyone is connecting to this idea being shared in the room by the artist. 

So after the show I knew it was do or die. This was gonna be my only chance EVER to see/meet/talk whatever to Ryan Gosling. I was in high school when "The Notebook" came out.  Like any other girl, Noah Calhoun was dreamy.  I had to make this opportunity happen!

As I approached, I saw two other girls go up and do the same. They said hello and then Ryan Gosling shook his head at whatever they asked. I'm 99% positive it was a request for a photo. He shook his head w/ a hell no conviction. I knew whatever the hell I was going to say had to be short and no mention of picture!

So - i finally got closer. No other fans around him (to be fair, there were like a total of three - no one noticed he was there b/c you wouldn't see him unless you were in nearby seats....also it was dark in the crowd during the show). This was my chance!

There were three girls sitting by his right side. They were all emaciated, fashionable girls, wearing size -0 clothing of chiffon and leopard prints. They could not have been more than age 22. They all had red lips. Vogue, baby. As I got closer they began to whisper at me, shake their heads and violently scowl. They spoke just loud enough so I could hear, but he never seemed to turn to his right to notice they were talking to me. They began saying, "No, no."

I said, "oh i'm just gonna say hello." i said this in my sweetest Midwestern girl voice for fear of being cut by an LA fashionista.

"no! no! don't even think about it - he IS NOT in the mood."

As i got closer to him, the final curse came out from their hissing lips: "It's not going to work."

Looking back at the moment, what was THAT supposed to mean? I realized these young women were in a completely different expectation level. What did they mean by "It's not going to work?"
Did they think I was going to bear my chest, rip my clothes off, write my phone # on his abs? I have no idea, I just thought this empty threat was extremely odd.

ALSO: why does his entourage consist of these women? EVA MENDES - i wish you woulda been there. You're hot. and you seem nice.

Finally he turned to me, knowing i was one of "those girls." Initially he looked tired and blase and a tinge of sour. Once I said Hi, he responded with the same word. I then said, "I hope you're enjoying your time in Austin!" I said this as a RA welcoming committee would say to a pack of freshmen. It was genuine and whole-hearted. I think once he realized i wasn't asking for a picture or to make out w/ his face he was no longer perturbed. After I said that, he held out his hand, i took it and he said, "Thank you."  He seemed like a very tolerant fellow.

But let me gush a little bit more. Can I just say that man is as handsome as he is in the pictures. Which is a hellavah lot handsome. His eyes are a beautiful, crisp blue green and his tousled hair was --- just devastating. Also he was wearing all black. Another sexy detail. Ugh! such a hot man.

Source: google.com via Savannah on Pinterest

A local review of the concert here.

gig

we have a gig tonight. i will be singing my little heart out at a dive bar in Austin. Dark corners will resound with music and a humble beginning will be abounding.it's our debut, as we say on our FB page we are "we are tragically western wearing fishnets of rock."

my creative juices have been drowning me lately. i have too many ideas and not enough time to get them out onto paper. keep it coming, i just hope they can all fully grow! i wish i was this creative all the time! it's like a drug to feel this way.

#momentofgratitude

i bike everywhere and i work at a museum. and i have a gig THIS Thursday. and I'm seeing David Byrne and St. Vincent.

I LOVE MY LIFE!

THANK YOU to whoever planned this.

Source: blog.jelanieshop.com via Savannah on Pinterest

Without makeup

The IMOM who mildly crushed my soul earlier this year is now a journalist. He writes for big papers.  I was reading an article in an international publication today and realized it was by him.  How weird.

Later in the day, I was coming from the gym, sweaty and no makeup. I was on the phone with my brother. i never see the IMOM and haven't since the second breakup. yes, the little crushing of the soul bit was probably due to the second time around. which was far worse than the first. i learned my lesson, though. can a person be more than twice shy, cuz i'd say i'm like 500x shy now. lol.

anyways i saw him out of the corner of my eye -
and then proceeded veering violently left. of course all of this made it more obvious, so i kept walking. he tried to sweep up to me on his bike,.but then saw that i was blatantly ignoring his existence HARDCORE MODE and then backuped up and zoomed down the street.

as i rode my bike home i thought "damnnit! i wasn't even hot looking."

but then i realized i was exactly as "i am"in that moment. i was no makeup, sweaty me.  and i don't think i ever was without makeup when we dated. i always wanted to look my best.  i also never shared ANY real secrets, shame, or desires with him. We never really knew each other that intimately  Neither of us would crack so we never took the plunge, never got cold or sore or vulnerable. As i've gotten older i've realized you can love many, but there are only a few lovers you'll actually ever be truly intimate with. and those are the ones that matter. those are the ones that make your heart pound with delight and make you feel like a better person. And i've had that beautiful situation happen before, but the IMOM was never one of them.

So i guess what i'm saying is that it was fitting that he finally saw me: stripped, no makeup, just me. he finally got a chance to see THE REAL ME, the one i never wanted to show him, the one he never wanted to truly see or know. whoever he knew before doesn't exist anymore.

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