Thursday night i went to a really expensive/trendy restaurant and sat alone at the bar, waiting for my friend, E. This restaurant is one of my favorite places, but i never get to go there cuz it's too expensive. I got a notice about my loans yesterday. This notice made me feel anger, resentment and bitterness towards my education (even though it's given me a job i love and some money). And LOGICALLY, as a way to spite the universe for asking me to pay $2,000,000.00/month on my repayment plan, I decided it was a GREAT idea to go to a super fancy restaurant. That would show the universe.
I don't have a problem with being alone in a public place. I actually find a weird peacefulness in it. In the busy world we live in, it's nice to not be on a computer, sit with yourself and just "be". Maybe look around at the people. Make up stories about them and where they are going and who they are in love with and why they are here at the same space as you are. When you are alone I think you really can taste your food and see things more intensely. There is nothing to disrupt the moment you are in. It's fun to share good things with people - food and sunsets - but there's also something deeply satisfying when you are the only one experiencing a single moment. It's a secret moment that happened for you and no one else will ever know about it. Unless you Instagram, Tweet, or make a Facebook status about it. And that's why it's key to not be on your phone all the time. It creates useless distraction taking away from a very sacred thing. Yes - tasting a beer and eating oysters can be a sacred thing. Anything you want can, actually.
Ok - so to move on from my Wonka Speech -
So i was at the bar. The bartender asked if i "come here often." I said, no. Too expensive.
We proceeded to banter and by the time my friend came and I got the bill I saw there was a measley $10.00 charge. My table was easily $40.00.
Thank you for making me a shameless vixen, God. Keeping me outta the poorhouse.
The bartender told me to come back, "I'll hook you up."
And honestly for the free oysters alone I just may do that.
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