I'm off of work today to do a slew of doctors' appointments. Right now, in between the first and second one i am sitting in a cafe in downtown Austin. i am eating an egg cheddar sausage panini w/ a black coffee.
Surrounding me is a man who looks like a goth novelist. He has black hair, ghost white skin, bags under his eyes that are laden with eyeliner.
There is another man on an interview with a woman. He seems to be doing well so far. He is talking about a health software he has created. He wants to sell it, he wants to work for her company very badly. He lived in Mexico for two years as a Realtor. He appears to look younger than me. He describes himself as a "fearless, wunderkind". He wants a job that keeps his stress down so he can take care of his new puppy. Ok, the interview may have taken a dip, i guess.
I walked past "Pure" gym. It's where visiting Hollywood actors and former ABC "Bachelors" go to get toned. There were white women in Lululemon yoga pants pushing their children around in carts at Whole Foods. They were all well taken care of, yet frantically searching for organic cereal.
Now more tech people are shuffling in. Men on their own schedules. No women. Except for the one conducting the interview of the young wunderkind. Which i guess evens things out.
How does one have their own schedule? I think being your own boss is extremely appealing. But i wonder if i'd be able to keep to schedule, deliver quality every time and not burn out.
This article got me thinking of the following paragraphs. Be prepared! If you read the article I've linked to you may get way heavy philosophically too fast, too soon. (As was my case! Snowballing into an existential crisis, of course.)
The funny thing is, that i've remembered recently, is even when you get the "perfect" work schedule, the "perfect" life, you still suffer. You're still unhappy with something. Which is not a bad thing. We just automatically think in American society that we must constantly strive for complete fulfillment - which is a great idea. But what is wrong with contentment?
Two other things you must be wary of in our society are the ideas of:
1) proper work life balance
2) that your job fulfills you
Neither of these things are true. Neither of these things are usually healthy for everyone.
In America we seem to never have any balance. That is why women choose careers over babies or vice versa - there is no "balanced", "in between" option for you.
Not every job has to be fulfilling. Activities after work can be fulfilling to you. I do love what I do. I went to get my Masters in order to do that from 9-5. But it doesn't necessarily fulfill me. It feeds me and gets me medical coverage - and yes, occasionally it is very stimulating to the intellectual mind and public service oriented, which i like. BUT i have other interests that give me a sense of purpose.
I'd love to end this post with some sort of inspirational quote, but that's not how i feel. I feel like there are so many more questions than answers. But i can relate to this quote:
“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
Delicious Ambiguity.”
― Gilda Radner
I can't say as of now i relate to the "Delicious Ambiguity". Rather bitter from my end right now. But i am trying. That's all i can do.
Surrounding me is a man who looks like a goth novelist. He has black hair, ghost white skin, bags under his eyes that are laden with eyeliner.
There is another man on an interview with a woman. He seems to be doing well so far. He is talking about a health software he has created. He wants to sell it, he wants to work for her company very badly. He lived in Mexico for two years as a Realtor. He appears to look younger than me. He describes himself as a "fearless, wunderkind". He wants a job that keeps his stress down so he can take care of his new puppy. Ok, the interview may have taken a dip, i guess.
I walked past "Pure" gym. It's where visiting Hollywood actors and former ABC "Bachelors" go to get toned. There were white women in Lululemon yoga pants pushing their children around in carts at Whole Foods. They were all well taken care of, yet frantically searching for organic cereal.
Now more tech people are shuffling in. Men on their own schedules. No women. Except for the one conducting the interview of the young wunderkind. Which i guess evens things out.
How does one have their own schedule? I think being your own boss is extremely appealing. But i wonder if i'd be able to keep to schedule, deliver quality every time and not burn out.
This article got me thinking of the following paragraphs. Be prepared! If you read the article I've linked to you may get way heavy philosophically too fast, too soon. (As was my case! Snowballing into an existential crisis, of course.)
The funny thing is, that i've remembered recently, is even when you get the "perfect" work schedule, the "perfect" life, you still suffer. You're still unhappy with something. Which is not a bad thing. We just automatically think in American society that we must constantly strive for complete fulfillment - which is a great idea. But what is wrong with contentment?
Two other things you must be wary of in our society are the ideas of:
1) proper work life balance
2) that your job fulfills you
Neither of these things are true. Neither of these things are usually healthy for everyone.
In America we seem to never have any balance. That is why women choose careers over babies or vice versa - there is no "balanced", "in between" option for you.
Not every job has to be fulfilling. Activities after work can be fulfilling to you. I do love what I do. I went to get my Masters in order to do that from 9-5. But it doesn't necessarily fulfill me. It feeds me and gets me medical coverage - and yes, occasionally it is very stimulating to the intellectual mind and public service oriented, which i like. BUT i have other interests that give me a sense of purpose.
I'd love to end this post with some sort of inspirational quote, but that's not how i feel. I feel like there are so many more questions than answers. But i can relate to this quote:
“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
Delicious Ambiguity.”
― Gilda Radner
I can't say as of now i relate to the "Delicious Ambiguity". Rather bitter from my end right now. But i am trying. That's all i can do.
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